The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Of course I have a pirate flag
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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