I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize