Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize