Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
