this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
