I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize