Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
