she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize