I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
