we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
