Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
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