Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
So many bounce houses so little time
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
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