Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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