If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
