Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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