i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
They took my balls.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
