All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
