It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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