found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize