i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
ugly people sure do ruin things
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
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