wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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