FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
