Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
