I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
