i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
