She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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