i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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