Do you still have your period?
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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