I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
