What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Randomize