I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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