It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
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this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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