On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize