You smell like stripper and shame
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
