My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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