i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Your topless pictures make me question reality
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize