My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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