What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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