i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize
