Ambien. No doubt about it.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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