So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Randomize