Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize