Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
You work out of a Hotel?
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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