Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
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