I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I bet he comes in French.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
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