Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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