So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
