i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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