its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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