addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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