grandma shit on top of the toilet
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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