You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
