Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member