im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
