fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
