I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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